Agrrrrrrrrr again!


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Post Agrrrrrrrrr again!

#1  erenda 24 Jun 2005 14:25

Sorry for complaining like that and wasting your time   ,but I need some advace. Many of you have children. This summer te parent's committee decided to send their only child in Albena. Albena is a great resort in general , full of shops and discotheques but it's not a great place to work in. Whatever you work there the working time is not fixed. I know there are some rules in the labour code about the working time and the salary but who said they have to be observed.   People at my age work usually 12 hour (yes I typed it correctly). for 200 levs for a moths (100 euros?) and the boss has the right to say in any time : "I don't like how you work , you're fired!"   and not pay you anyting. It is not necessery to be a reason for that. Another problem is traveling from Dobrich to Albena and vice versa... every single day or living in a tiny little room witch looks abandoned full of all possible sorts of insects.The summer is the only time of the year I can relaxe a little and they'll send me to Albena. Most of the people I know who have worked there quited after a week maximum. And in oter hand this means I'll have no time to write in this forum or whenever use Internet. The most irritating of all is that I , unlike te others have another option but my parents said they don't need my help any more. According to them a work in Albena will improve my language ( it's full of foreing tourists), yes but it will not improve my health. I may be a little masochistic but I'm not crazy. And of course the work exiges to talk with people and smiling ...bliak! ...I don't talk much , I'm not a model and I after the sun attack I'll look... I also don't like sun so much.
Would some of you send his/her children in such a place? Not mentioning it's dangerous to travel in the night or sleeping alone in a litttle room away from the resort. And this is only because they want me to grow up as faster as possible. What's so good about being an adult? I don't want to grow up that way.       
Any ideas how to avoid this slavely work? I like you I want to "see" you here.  
 



 
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#2  pangor 24 Jun 2005 17:20

Accept the position and be youself!  You will back home before that day is over, and won't have to worry about that place any more!   Ok, sorry about the joke.

I am not familiar with the customs of your country, so perhaps what I am about to say may not apply in your situation.  Have your parents ever tried to get to know you?  Not the person they would want you to be, but ther real you?  Have they tried to discover what make you happy and see if they can help you excell in it?  It seems to me that one thing that make you happy and that you enjoy is art.  Rather then concentrating on language training, have they even considered an art school or part time work at an art studio?

The sun!  Old Sol does not like me either.  I am prone to sun burns, very bad sun burns.  So, I have been careful to avoid too much sun.  A job as you describe this one would be a nightmare for me too.

In my case, I started working as a loborer when I was a teenager.  Actually, I was hired a few days before I was a teenager, and by first day of work was a day or so after I became one.  It was not a big job, it was for a few hours on the weekends and then week days after school.  It was not much of a job, mostly cleanup, repair, maintenance, and a little gardening.  But the firm was within easy walking distance from my home and I was happy to be helping out with the family finances and helping to save for my future education.  My mother never pushed me into work that I didn't like, rather I was the one pushing myself.

I don't know your situation enough, so this may be inappropriate, but it sounds like it is time four you and the "committee" to sit sown together and to really talk as adults.  No anger, no gloomy attitude, just talk about what you are, what you like and don't like and what sort of future you want to have.

They don't need to worry about your gowing up, I feel that you already have.  But that does not mean that you need to put aside the things that have brought you pleasure.  And it does no mean fitting in with the crowd as it sounds like they think.  It is taking responsibility for yourself, so if they to grow up, do it; and in by that talk the way that you can show them that you have.

If they want you to be the "perfect teenager", look at your classmates and others you know who they would consider "perfect teenagers" and gather together information of the trouble that those teenagers have been involved in and the bad thingings that they have done, things that you have avoided.  Present that informaiton at the talk and ask, "Would you prefer if I looked and acted like them and I was as promiscuious as U, or pregent like V, or a thief like W, or an adict like X, or have a criminal record for attempted muder like Y, or an addict like Z?  Or would you prefer me to be be not so "perfect" like them and home safe and sound?"

I know I would prefer a son or daughter who was a "little different" and who was safe, sound, and happy.  Rather than one who looks and acts "perfect" and trys to fit in with the "perfect" crowd and so always in trouble and danger and is miserable.

I hope that I have not over stepped my bounds here.

Pangor
 



 
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#3  erenda 24 Jun 2005 19:44

Thank you for te advaces Pangor!       It seems like you're a better psychologist that this we have in school.   My parents know I'm interesting even before I get in school. When I was little they liked a lot my drawings,but their was some teacher ( don't know the right word) in the kindergarden who recently told my mother things like:
"There's something wrong with you dauther?" ,"She looks too little" , (my mom is short too , my grandmother was shorter. It is normal to look little when your family looks like that.) " She don't talk to the other children." and such things witch according to the teacher or whatever this woman was are not normal so she want my mom to remove me in "special" kindergarden. I believe there's no need to explain what she meant by "special". Of course they didn't do it but the behaviour of the teacher changed. Anyway when I had to start school my parents make me choose between drawing class and gymnastics. ( I'm named after Diliana Georgieva she was artistic gymnastics player...) . Of course I said drawing and they didn't like the choice. When I want to took examp for an painting academy the only aswer was : "Who told you you can draw?" Also this elite highschool was their idea. My uncle studied in the same high school too but it was long time ago when this place was really a good school.
I'm not sure talking will help.
About the "perfect"teenager, well that's my mom favourite topic. Her hobby is to compare me to other people from my class without knowing them as I do. Years ago there was a boy from this high school (I was too little but I remember it) witch suddenly quit and my father admit him in the sport school, because he know his parents. This boy's life looked "perfect" : he was in the most elite school in the town , studing german , he had a girlfriend, other friends ..everyting was fine. But a month later he hanged himself. Why? Drugs of course. As far as I can remember there was no such cases in other schools except mine and another elite one. Usually the students from these two schools call the others stupid  .I mean my parents know about the "perfect" students but don't care as far as this "perfect" student has "A"'s. It's all about the "A"'s.
Now they want me to study "International tourism" because it's well paid. Tourism? There is a special school for that but they're studing how to be waiter. Why study for such a thing? They prefer a mediocre child with "A" than a diffrent one who can't study international tourism.
I had an idea to win a contest or someting and show them that art may be important too , but there's problem I can't win a contest as far as I haven't a Vicky in my picture.
So the best thing is to pretend to be sick , they can't send me to work 12 ours a day if I'm sick , right?  
Thank you once again.     
 



 
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Post Re: Agrrrrrrrrr again!

#4  Tormie 24 Jun 2005 21:40

[img=left:5360e8faa4]http://www.bulgariansearesorts.com/photos/resorts-albena_1.jpg[/img:5360e8faa4]
Hey, it looks good erenda   !

Your problems is a difficult thing to solve   . I red your post entirely and it seems that you don't agree too much your parents' decisions, and it is normal...

About Albena, it seem a good place for have a lot of fun, obviously if you're not working   ... Erenda, it could be a nice experience if you see it in a positive perspective. When one has your age doesn't think too much at the future, I can assure you that if your family has not a lot of money the only way that you'll have for your independency is to find a good work and earn money. The art that we practice here at last is only fun. There are masterpieces here, I like them a lot but if I compare the best of them with some picture of Michelangelo or other italian great artist of the past (italian because I can simply go there and see because I'm here   ) they are not the same. I think that this kind of art is for people who already was born with the talent, geniuses (genii).
If you're a genius you'll earn a lot of money with your work, if you're not a genius and you want to work in the art's world you've to study and practice a lot in order to obtain the "piece of paper" that could let you find a good work, like an illustrator, for example. Your parent have chossen for you a school different from what was your attitude, and i think it's wrong because my parents have done the same with me, I had (and still have) a talent for mechanics and electronic and they sent me to liceum to study latin and philosophy, then at the university I failed and now I drive buses (Hey, I'm not so unhappy with my life, I'm a person with not so much ambitions if not live happily and with my hobbies).
What I can suggest you is to finish your schools studying well, your primary objective should be to find a good work and leave your attitude for art as a secondary objective: it will never be too late for it ! If you've an idea for a picture you can paint it now or an year from now and it wll be the same... In the future it could be that you'll succed to earn money with your art, why not ? But if you've a good and stable work it shall not be a "life or dead" matter. Bulgaria is not one of the richest country, 100 € a month is very little but the life there shouldn't cost like here (I hope...), you should say us how much costs for example a 33 cl can of coca cola there, to have an idea... However you should seriously consider to find a work abroad, like in western europe or U.S.A. so an experience talking english or german in a tourists' place is not so bad (if they don't put you in the kitchen to clean dishes   ).
At last my suggestion is: try it for a week, if you don't like it fake illness and come home (your parents will be not happy...)

I'll send you my address in a PM (even if a "whois" on posetteforever.com it's the same...) so you shall send me and Posy a postcard   and let we know how the things are going   , even if you can't have access to internet there ( old style communication ).

When you'll have to leave ?
 




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#5  Posy 24 Jun 2005 21:40

Go on, tell me more. Actually I do not have a mother. Under what circumstances?
 




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#6  pangor 24 Jun 2005 21:55

If you are interested in contest see the email and PM I am sending you.

Pangor
 



 
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#7  erenda 24 Jun 2005 23:27

Thank you Tormentor!       Where did you get this photo from Albena? It looks a bit older.In our days te resort is full of hotels. Yes it looks good. About comparing te prices :
1 bottle of Coca-Cola : (2 litters) - 2 levs (1 euro) without the promotion
2. minimum wage allowed for any job - 150 levs per month ( 75 euro)
3. electricity tax -( growing everyday because some people decided to shut down AETS) 250 levs per moths (about 125 euros)
4. water - don't ask
5. a simple cup of coffee - 0,30 levs(0.15 euros)
6. cigaretttes (bugartabac) - 1.60 levs
7. pension after working 30 years as a teacher , secretary or someting like that - 80 levs per months (40 euros I know it's a mockery.. )

Now let's see the prices in Albena
1. the same cup of coffee-2.00 levs (1 euro)
2. cigarettes (bugartabac again) - 3.60 levs
3. a little bottle of Coca-Cola (half litter) - about 3.00 levs (1.50 euro)

So if I have to live there and get 200 levs for a month they will be all gone for ... a little than a month only for a cup of coffee and a little bottle of Coca-Cola every day. And my parents are better at math than me , so they don't send me there because of the money but to make" grow up faster ".      
When I said I want to work someting related to art I didn't mean digital art exactly , actually I'm thinking about journalism , that's why my second subject a part from foreing languages is litterature. There is a litterature and history examp for journalism.
But there was also an advertisment studio in Dobrich ( friends of my uncle) witch was searcing for a helper. They're using photoshop , Corel draw , PSP) is a bitmap graphics editor for computers running the Microsoft Windows operating system that was originally published by Minneapolis-based Jasc Software. In October 2004, Corel Corporation bought out Jasc software">paint shop pro , Macromedia Flash , gimp , and other 2D programs. I believe it's a good job for the summer for 190 levs and 8 hours working day ...it's a paradise. But of course it's not good enough for my parents. Anyway it's already taken by someone I think.
     I'll have to leave after 2 weeks when the school finish.I'm not sure fake illness would help because once you started there ( if there approve you after the "stage" for girls in general they choose thhe prettiest no matter if sh can't speak foreing languages very well) when you say " I'm sick" the aswer would be " Ok. Go home. You're fired.". I hope there would be some girl looking like a movie star and they'll choose her . After 2 weeks she'll not look so pretty any more...
 



 
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#8  Tormie 24 Jun 2005 23:33

     That job at the journal would have been very good for you... Damnit... I think that there are different prices for workers and tourist, or take the bus and go to the nearest city to buy what you need !
Ok, but in what will consist your job there ? Receptionist ?
 




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#9  erenda 24 Jun 2005 23:47

The nearest town is Dobrich ... 15 kilometers away from Albena.   Yes the prices are diffrent since...since te resort exists. They call te job "administrator" but it's receptionist.
Also I must smile ( bliak      ) show the tourists the hotel , expain diffrent things translate them something if they don't understand and say something like : "Thank you for visiting the best hotel in Albena!" aka lying like an old gypsy ( I'm not sure there's such phrase in english) all the time.  
Thank you for the link Pangor.   The only reason to paricipate in a contest was to make my parents feel proud of me. I know it sounds trivial...
 



 
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#10  Tormie 24 Jun 2005 23:53

Why trivial?
Only 15 kilometers? You should be home in 15 minutes after work with a bus... I run for 33 kilometers x 2 every day with my scooter (my car is still broken   ).

Hey, it can be a good experience  

( )
 




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#11  erenda 25 Jun 2005 00:05

Yes but I'm not sure te bus will wait for me.Maybe if I use my father's old car ( "Giguli" , someting like "Lada") ....   but I have no driver license. It's good for the rest drivers on the road. Have you ever tried to drive an old "Trabant" witout knowing anyting about driving? I tried... no "Trabant" any more... It was old anyway...     
 



 
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#12  Tormie 25 Jun 2005 00:08

Poor erenda..   (with bicycle about a hour   , and it's good for your health too)
 




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#13  TdaC 25 Jun 2005 00:13

Nope it doesn't sound trivial at all. I don't really know what i would do in your situation... I think that they think that they're doing what is best for you (i am not saying that they're right). And if you look at it from that point of view, you might try to show them that someting else would be better for you.

Sit down and talk to them - that's an adult thing to do  
Look as if you understand and care about what they're saying, keeo eyecontact - everyone likes to be listen to.
Write down what you're going to say before you talk with them, find facts if you can to back up your arguement ( like the crime statistic of Albena, what a journalst can earn as well as travelling to cover news etc)
Think of what they might obect to and come up with a counter arguement for that.
Don't say things like It is, I can/can't, don't make statements. Say things like i experiance...i feel,..... sounds stupid i know but for some reasons it makes people listen more.

What they said about your drawing i think they said to discourge you, you know make you stop because they think that it is a profession that it is hard to make a living in.
My aunt & uncle was the same way with my cousin. He's really good at music, always has been. His parents felt that it was too hard to make it in the music industri, they wanted him to choose anonther profession. They even hid his radio and instruments. Even though it was a lot of fights and was a struggle for him to make his dreams come true, he did it. He is now a composer, he has played for many of the kings and queens in europe, there' has been documenteries about him, he has written books, he has writen music for a lot of tv things, he has won awards and he's a multimillionaire.  ( He's acomposer of modern classical music). All because he did what he wanted to do and not what everyone told him to do.  Everyone said he couldn't do it. Now his parents are proud of corse...
 



 
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#14  erenda 25 Jun 2005 00:57

Thank you TdaC!   WoW your cousin have to be very obstinate . I'm not sure journalist can be a multimilionaire but here there are some journalists (and writers in the same time) witch have becomed "immortal" because of their writings like Botev his articles were ironic and very spiteful but we're studing most of them in scool in a litterature class and a few of his poems. Also Aleko Konstantinov is a good exemple , his professiom was a lawyer , but he's more famous with his articles and of course his book "Bai Ganoi" witch is also a way to present the bulgarian political class in the beggining of the XX century. I forgot I'm not in the litterature class , sorry. I have a little experience in journalism...in my old school's newspaper... and in writing....poems...(No poetry any more!      ) When I was 8-9 years old I gave a notebook full of poems to a friend and her mother who was a teacher in the same school I was studing wanted to publish them in the newspaper . She found them "too serious " for a 8-9 years old person. I said  "No" of course.   (The words "hate" , "blood" , "nothing" were present in every of them...who will want to read such a thing anyway) .
The last article I wrote was  in the litterature class about te immigration , elections , the USA lottery for citizenship and other tings like that ,witch was rejected by the teacher because it was ironic and didn't conform his political views..      .But my parents like it... not very much but they like it .
 



 
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