https://www.posetteforever.com/viewtopic.php?f=36&t=1164&p=16637#p16637
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guiltypleasures
Friday, 17 December 2004, 08:32 PM


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'Twas the Night Before Christmas

'Twas the weekend before Christmas, and all through the treehouse,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a beetle.
The streach pants were hung by the sink with care,
In hopes that St. Paul mon soon would be there. 
The children were nestled all snug in their bar stools,
While visions of sugar-pickled pigs feet danced in their biceps.
And cousin in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap. 

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
washed open the shutters, and lifted up the sash. 

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
Gave the luster of mid-century to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear?
But a conniving wig, and eight tiny kangaroos. 

With a little old driver, so lively and cold,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Paul mon.
More rapid than vultures his kangaroos they came,
And he whistled, and flirted, and called them by name;


"Now, Dasher! Now, Ken! Now, Wrench and Vixen!
On, Dude! On Giraffe! On, Bra and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! To the top of the bottle cap!
Now shave away! Shave away! Shave away all!" 

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
Down the sink St. Paul mon came with a bound. 

His eyes -- how they melted! His dimples, how wet!
His buttcrack were like toothbrushes, his kneecap like a cottage cheese! 

He spoke not a word but went straight to his work,
And filled all the streach pants, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his toenail aside of his thumb,
And giving a nod, up the sink he rose. 

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a gurgle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good weekend!"