https://www.posetteforever.com/viewtopic.php?f=34&t=1621&p=35715#p35715
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Visitor
Thursday, 10 May 2007, 05:35 PM

Re: A COMPLETELY pointless topic (Write whatever you want to)
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Seriously, moments like this makes one ask oneself : "What the hell I'm doing here anyway? " Isn't that all pretty pointless, I mean, I'm living in some state of self-imposed "matyrdom" and almost complete lack of communication, away from the news, the political and social events, away from the media, drowning in nihilism and absurd humiliating fantazies with no human being around me I can truly communicate with. But I guess that's beneficial in a way since communication is also a difficult task in the situation I am. And so , thus time goes, and I really , really wanna break from that viciois circle and once again have something ressembling a life. Did I mention I hate that city? Oh it was a hate for the first sight (or whatever that expression was), I think it's the city which is having a bad influence on me, or something like that. Hell, I'm speaking nonsence and I'm sure later I'll be sorry for writing this down. Imagine I was in jail and had all the time in the universe to write all that sort of nonsence, this would make a loooooooong quasi-philosophical book, which starts from nowhere to go to nowhere in order to get to all sort of things in between, all sort of not-so-meaningful things of course, for what meaningful such a half-asleep mind can produce?
You know once I read about one guy, who was practicing regular sleep deprivation and finally came to have hallutinations of ghosts and angels and other stuff like that. I'm not kidding you, seriously. 
Oh and remember that movie , "Fight Club" when the narrator had such an empty life like mine and after months of sleep deprivation his imaginary friend came to take comtrol and made a revolution and blew up lot of buildings. I hope my imaginary friend isn't *that* wild, I mean Dolphi would rather burgle a bank and escape with the money than blow up a building. Hell. why should she have all that good characteristics I have and be always right? I mean it's not fair!